Stefan Bachmann

Venice Adventures

I went to Veniiiiiice!


I had reasons, I promise. I feel like every second blog post is just like “Stefan in a different country, being a brat,” but I HAD TO GO. *wipes brow* *finishes justifying self*

Anyway, it was beauteous.


Venice, being beauteous.

Let me show you pictures:


Fish market in Rialto. Not fantastic-smelling.



One dog will stand against them.


And Pinocchio will, too.
Gelatoooooo. Last time I was in Italy I was ten and I remember basically living off gelato for two weeks. In my old age I have become lame and boring, and only had it once.
Speaking of old age, I love this street and I want to live in it when I’m 95, and shout at neighbors from one of those little balconies, because 95-year-olds don’t curr.



On a boat. Going slow.
Feed the birds. They like tourists.
Those two slightly discolored pillars are where the death sentences were read to the adoring crowds below.


He looks like he’s anticipating blessings from above.


Do let’s.
Just in mah gondola, gettin’ groceries.


If you go to Venice I so recommend the north part/Ghetto above all else. It’s so much quieter, but just as pretty as the tourist-y parts.
How I imagine Lady Gaga’s good friends address her.
Romeo and Juliet 2: The Venetian Honeymoon – A Ghost Story

Ok, so I texted this picture to some friends and tweeted it and was all kinds of effusive, because this fellow reminds me of that Pixar short and is just generally cool-looking, and some people thought it was horrible, because who wears a funnel on his head voluntarily, and surely he was being exploited for tourists’ amusement, and he should be at home with his grandkids or something. Um. Let’s break this down: would this guy *normally* wear a funnel on his head? I don’t know. You don’t know either. Let’s assume not, though. So A) if wearing a funnel-hat and looking ridiculous interesting and eccentric is how you earn your living, and you can manage to look as chill as this guy did, that’s pretty admirable, and B) there should be nothing embarrassing about wearing funnel-hats or playing accordion in the street. Maybe he likes it. Maybe he doesn’t. He wouldn’t be the first person with a job he doesn’t like. It’s called performing. Basically, none of us know what he thinks, but implying he *shouldn’t* be doing it because he’s elderly/funnel-hats are stupid, is also kind of rude, no? People don’t just reach an expiration date and then sit around with their grandkids all day. ALSO, MAYBE HE HAS NO GRANDKIDS.
I can’t believe I had to type that whole paragraph. End of subject.


IN ACTION. The guy with the roller suitcase is PETRIFIED WITH AWE.
Window full of water.


It was actually a window reflecting the canal, but it’s kind of surreal, no?
Basically me after four hours of practicing.


Ok, this painting. It’s at the Ca’ d’Oro museum, and I forgot to check who it’s by but it’s great. I can’t tell if he’s grief-stricken or annoyed or a psycho wondering how he wants to cook your liver. He’s got like a Rohrschach Test face. Theories? WHAT IS HE THINKING, WHAT DO YOU SEE?
Pastaaaaaa. With shriiiiiiimp. My favorite food everrrrrr.
These little bridges. I love them.


Found a secret garden and wandered through it. Gardens are kind of rare in Venice.


This house struck me as Dark and Mysterious. The picture doesn’t do it justice. And you can’t see how that door opens directly onto the canal, which is cool for, like, throwing out annoying guests.


LIMONCELLO. (If I remember right, this is what Bartholomew’s mom and their neighbor are drankin’ in that scene in The Peculiar where Bartholomew finds out about the Raggedy Man.)






I thought this said Rio de La Toiletta, so imagine my disappointment.


There are many mask shops in Venice. This was the one we went to. . .


. . . because of its cool shutters.


Sassy cat people.


Do you see?
(I recently saw someone wearing a full-on top-hat in Zürich, and I tweeted about it like “AHHHH” and now this? Coincidence? Probably I think not. Victorian time travelers are among us. They have backpacks.)

So that was nice. 🙂 I had never been to Venice before, which is weird because it’s fairly close to where I live. But now I have been there! And I loved it, and it was book-inspiring, which I was not actually expecting, and I was only there briefly but there’s great art and architecture and ATMOSPHERE. It definitely feels a bit like an amusement park, which is odd for such a historically significant city. There are so many tourists, of which I was one, and we flow through the streets and buy things and eat things and then leave. It made me wonder how the city must have been 30/40/100 years ago, when there were, like, Italian people living in it. Ya know? The Victorian time travelers definitely know.

6 Comments to “Venice Adventures”

  1. Liz Brooks says:

    I agree, that was definitely a Victorian time traveler. I'm glad you had a great time in Venice! I've always wanted to go there, and the food pictures look so great–especially the gelato one and the pasta one. As for the painting with the hard to read face, I think he's a little bit annoyed, and also a little bit disgusted? Maybe he sees you as something gross he found on his shoe? And it's funny–I wouldn't have seen the guy with the funnel hat as being exploited. I mean, since you mentioned it, I can see why some people might think that. But seriously? He wears the funnel hat very well. Thanks for sharing!

  2. Anonymous says:

    I think the portrait looks scared!!!!!! Like, first look at it, without even reading your tag I was like 'He's scared of something.' but I like the cannibal theory too. 🙂

  3. Clayvessel says:

    I'm glad you *finally* made it to Venice! It was great to see your photos and remember my wanderings there just one year ago (maybe with the same companion as you? Ha!)
    Also, you are a nut and you make me laugh every time. I hope everyone gets the subtleties of your remarks.
    (The guy in the painting is definitely disgusted!)

  4. Jack says:

    I have a dream of going to Venice someday. That city is amazing

  5. Pankhurst says:

    I've been a lurking for a while now and I just wanted you to know that I love your blog and reading about your travels. You're very lucky. Keep doing what you're doing.

  6. […] That said, I loved Florence – had never been before – and Venice I liked even more than last time. Italy is so hot in the summer, but Venice was cool and had a nice sea-breeze and was just being […]

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